Eighty Sixth Friday Flash: Going Viral

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AP53 didn't know what to do. Everyone was infected. It just took the slightest touch and he would be infected too; doomed to lose all function every so often to sprout out 15 to 30 seconds of viral advert phrases like “50% off all stock.” “Act now!” “Gimble sausages are the tastiest you will ever eat.” “You are nothing if you don't own a Capone hat.” “Are you a loser? Then became a winner today with 72 easy monthly payments of $12.99.” It was enough to drive anyone mad.

Bizarrely no accidents had been caused by it yet, with the virus program seeming to recognize the user would be in a life threatening situation if it activated at the wrong moment, but people couldn't be busy all the time. Taking public transport was a nightmare with random slogans being thrown around continuously. 

Everything had been tried from root installs to total wipeouts. It was because the systems installing the restore points were infected too and just reloaded the virus. There were numerous “cures” out there, but all of them had been proved to be bogus conmen trying to make a quick buck.

But if AP53 didn't connect to the NETWORK soon he would lose his job and apartment. His supposed permanent connection AM69 had left him last week, saying he was against change and should just accept it. But why should he let large corporations hijack his body and turn him into walking billboard.

Most ignored it, they were so bombarded with adverts that they just didn't care anymore. A few had taken their lives because it was just too much. His friend ART78 had thrown himself into a garbage compactor just that morning. The police were at the door.

“Please sign this release form,” said the android officer. ART78 had left him his entire digital collection of movies and literature.

Shocked and operating on autopilot AP53 pressed his thumb to the electronic clipboard.

The door closed behind AP53 and ten seconds later he stopped dead still. “Are you a lonely bachelor and looking to settle down? Then look no further than 'Date an Officer.' Your number one source for meeting potential dates in uniform.”