Friday, 23 September 2011

Twenty-Second Friday Flash: Block Wars

(Image source)

Block Wars
The time was fast approaching. There was going to be two hours of pure chaos and unhinged anarchy. Angus couldn't wait to take his frustrations out on some loser from Block B. Four weeks of hard slog and now it was time to play. Angus and a few of his neighbours were lined up outside in the massive courtyard between the two apartment blocks, the rag tag bunch of Block B were lined up on the opposite side.
They were all waiting for the buzzer to signify the start of the block war. There were Golem referees in the middle of the courtyard to make sure things didn't get too out of hand, but Angus wasn't worried about them, they were so slow you could get away with pretty much anything if you wanted to.
Angus let out a bellow as he rushed forward, a wicked grin spread across his bearded face. He could see the guy who had keyed his bike, a silver haired night elf from the local lawyer firm Fangs, Nightshift and Posterone. Angus slowed down his pace when he noticed that the night elf wasn't alone. He was holding two leashes.
"Curses!" Angus couldn't believe it. The scum had two hellhounds. Two invisible beasts capable of taking down a yeti. And the worst of it, it seemed that he was coming straight for Angus. Knowing his aluminum baseball bat would do very little damage Angus climbed up the nearest golem referee. The golem tried to swat him off, but couldn't reach him.
"You get off."
"It's not going to help you Angus, your number is up!" called the night elf.
"What did I ever do to you? You're the one who keyed my car!"
"Ha! Please, you and your buddies revving up your bikes every morning like a pack of banshees while I'm trying to sleep."
"It's just not me!"
"Oh, you're just the first. Your friends will pay soon."
The hellhounds growled.
"Save me," pleaded Angus.
"You know rules, once you in fight you can't leave until buzzer."
"But he has hellhounds! So unfair!"
"You should have got your own."
Angus remembered the bulge in his pocket, and whipped out his iFone. Within seconds he had opened up the IMercenary app. It would take him months to pay off, but it might be the only way he could survive. Clicking on the pay button he waited and hoped.
"Eat em boys! And I want nothing left!" Growled the night elf. The gray skinned man let go of the straining leashes.

Angus, climbed further up the golem and balanced on its head. The golem seemed to have amazingly caught one of the hellhounds by the leash but the other was loose and coming for him. Angus swung his bat, it connected with something. There was a small yelp, moments later the bat was ripped from his hands and was chewed up by the hellhound, it sounded like a bunch of spoons being ground up a garbage disposal. The hellhound seemed to be clinging onto the golem by digging its claws into the golem's referee uniform.
Seeing no choice Angus jumped from the Golem's head and landed with a roll. Taking to his heels Angus ran as fast as his little dwarf legs could take him, barging his way through the fighting crowd, for perhaps a dozen feet before the hellhound caught up. It plowed through the combatants, who quickly dodged out of the way when they realized what was going on, no one interfered with a hellhound.
Angus could hear the beast's heavy breathing, and snarls. This was it. His last block war, but all was not lost just as the hellhound jumped for him a griffon swooped in and picked him up.
The fair maiden, that was riding the flying eagle/lion, snatching him up by the arm and throwing him on the back of the beast behind her.
"You took your time!"
The pink haired nymph turned to him and grinned. "I could always drop you back down if you like?"
"No! No... as of today I'm retiring, no more block wars for me. I'm also thinking of selling my Harley, are you interested?"
"No, Griff is all the power I need," she said stroking her griffon affectionately. "But I know a warlock who might be."


  1. Ha, I liked the idea of an iMercenary app. I was trying to figure out of this was Fantasy Sports or just a fight to the death!

  2. This is one of your best flashes, Craig. Tight writing and lots of action!

    Seems like creatures in this world don't have much sense of proportion. An old fashioned fist-fight over keying a car or revving bikes after hours is fine, but a fight to the death? Heh. Smart move on Angus's part, climbing the ref then (literally) calling for help. And he got a nymph? Hmmmm, might be some side benefits to that one, eh?

    One minor quibble: I think "all was not lost" could be clipped out (6th para from the end).

  3. This story made me laugh. I like the iphone app thing. I myself do not have an iphone nor do I have a phone that goes on the interwebs... if I did I might be even more addicted to twitter. But I remain firm on my staying away from twitter on saturdays and sundays. lol

    Great flash, minor issue on "It's just not me!"
    I think you meant "It's not just me." lol only issue I found, other than that, nice!

  4. Lots of action here, I felt for sure that his app wasn't coming through and he was done for. Hooray for griffin lady!

    Nice flash!

  5. Lovely world building here. I wonder how much the block wars are encouraged by the IMercenary Corp. Fun way you captuerd all of this!

  6. Love the site. I am your newest follower.

  7. Very creative. Enjoyed the fun read. Look forward to discovering your work.

  8. Oh wow... Great idea.. I liked that art... Good job! Keep posting.. I am happy to visit again...