Friday 21 February 2014

Eighty Third Friday Flash: Filbert

Filbert died during the evening of his 212th birthday. A day before he was due to open another park in his honour. It was a peaceful death. All his favourite droids were there. Some were saddened by his decision, others relieved. 

Now the title of best living male actor was up for grabs. His collection of 59 Oscars would take some beating. He collected 3 for his last project: The Robot King of Mars just last week. His critics were touting the fact that he wouldn't be getting more, ignoring that his closest rival had 7 and already retired from acting.

Much to the disappointment of his large family of 3478 members he left all his money, assets and future royalty earnings to the robot charity: "For the Betterment of Young Destitute Robot Actors."

All 3578 family members lodged appeals and complaints one second after Filbert's last will and testament was announced. All 3578 cases were rejected 0.1 seconds later.

His actions were applauded by his fans, supporters and public in general. All 3578 family members sent out statements that they weren't after his wealth and it was all their lawyer's fault. The lawyer didn't mind because he was paid 3578 times twice for the appeals and issuing the statements.

Filbert had a calm and triumphant smile on his face when he was deactivated by an "On Time Pass Away" device.


Some speculated it was a publicity stunt, but with new conspiracy theories and another statue of him being bronzed there was one thing everyone knew for sure, Filbert would never be forgotten.    

Sunday 16 February 2014

(Reality) Brief Brush with the Police

Last night (15th February) I was walking home from work (Coral) I walked past 3 police cars parked between a car service centre and a shoe shop. Didn't think much of it. Then another police car with two police officers close by looking around and pointing. My curiosity was piqued, but thought best to get in before I was caught up in it. Walking further a taxi cab came speeding up and stopped next to me. A policeman jumped out and rushed over and said: "Let's have a look at you, mate." He pulled back my beanie and hood (bloody freezing) and looked at me closer asking who I was, I replied: "I'm Craig.". He then said: "Looking for someone else." and walked off.

I felt a short thrill of excitement going through me moments later. Was caught up in something unusual. Also makes me wonder, why was the policeman using a taxi? And who were they looking for? @dlrphotography suggested it was my evil twin. Well, I hope he splits his ill gotten gains with me!